De Tegel van Tom (& Kai) - Day 366

Dear Tom,

What a year it have been. Before we come to that I want to say something to you. I am sorry that I didn’t write you that often anymore. Our daily conversation, although mostly one-sided, were one of the highlights of my day. Talking to you about cycling, an unusual news item or just a thought that came to me during the day. I could always share it with you and get it out of my head. The thing is you and I both know how life sometimes can get in the way of things you thought would never end. I started a new job that sucked up almost all of my time and in those rare moments of free time I really wanted to catch up with friends and family. Of course because they are friends and family, but also because I knew back then that I wasn’t going to see them for a while. Because Tom, you might have had a splendid year with your amazing victory in de Giro d’Italia and your long deserved world time trial victory, but I had kind of a cool year myself as well. I travelled the world. Or to say it correctly, I am still traveling the world. So yea, we were both busy and I hope you understand my situation.

Today though I was thinking about you. I really wanted to write something again. I didn’t do that for a while now, although I had a lot of stories to tell. And then I saw you on my phone screen. You gave an interview about the upcoming mountain stage in the Giro. Your Giro. You were talking about the first test and the fact that the road finally would start to climb instead of the nervous twisting and turning from the last days. You spoke as big men. A leader. A champion. Funny how things can change in a year. 
But yea I thought of you and I thought back to the times we spoke to each other everyday. And it was more a feeling than a real thought , but something in me felt like writing you again. So here I am. Hopefully you are all ears sitting in the team bus on your way to the start of the stage.

Tom, as the title says it is day 366 today. I’m away from home now for one year and one day. I’m writing you this letter while the low Asian sun warms my skin. If I look to my left I see the hostel where I just arrived. It is a one of a kind. In the middle of the mountains, a 360 view, chill people and an even chiller temperature. The little town the hostel is in, is called Pai. A well known place among backpackers. Once you quit cycling after becoming the best Dutch cyclist of all time, you should consider coming here. I think a guy like you would like it here. Enfin, back to the story. 366 days it has been since I slept in a single bed without backpacks and bunk beds around me, 366 days it have been since I decided to walk up to my best friends house (you know, one of the other guys that used to write you. The one with the funny spelling mistakes) spontaneously to go for a walk, play some soccer or have an intense game of FIFA, 366 days it has been since I did one of those late night drinks on the market square in Breda with another really good friend of mine talking about everything in life and 366 days it have been since I came downstairs walking into a peaceful living room where a slightly bold but energetic man and a refreshing looking woman played a game of scrabble on the Sunday morning. My parents are such beautiful people. 

And Tom, although all of this sounds so good and reading while typing it makes me imagine those scenes really lively, I can honestly say that I don’t miss it. Don’t get me wrong Tom, of course I miss them. And of course it would be so cool if I could have one day back home just to do all of these things at once, but life is to short to wonder about the things you don’t have. You rather cherish the things you do have. Enjoying the moment some people call it, carpe diem is also a fairly often used term in these kind of situations. I would like to just call it “living”. Meaning that you just enjoy whatever you are doing in the here and now with all your energy and attention you have. Sounds simple, but it actually isn’t.

In the last 365 days at least 50% of the time I have wondered about the days that had past or the days that were about to come. It’s just a human thing to do that. But the thing is, in those other 50% of the days, I have taught myself to realize the specialness of the moment I was in. Instead of taking a picture to capture those moments, I would rather just look at them through my own eyes. Instead of sharing those moments with the friends from back home I mentioned, I would just keep the moment for myself, fully live it and share it later on whenever I spoke to them. Instead of thinking what would come after those moments I would rather cherish the fact that I was in them right now. It is not hard, Tom, but it requires some deep breaths and a clear mind.

This year, how crazy it might sound, made me realize how to live. It taught me something no job, school or person could have taught me, purely because you can only find out yourself. Every human being is unique so for every human being learning how to live will differ. Some will have the balls to go on the journey to find out, some pretend they already know and some have peace with the fact that they don’t know because they are simply happy with the life they have. I mean I’m not giving a lecture on life and living, Tom, I just want to share my thoughts and feelings about it. Thanks for that. Hopefully I gave you something to think about. It should get you at least to the bottom of the Etna today. 

Okay enough about the philosophy of life. I want to tell you about some awesome things I did. A lot of people I spoke to the last couple of days asked me what the coolest things were I did. Simply because I have been gone for so long and also because I am almost done traveling. See it as one of those interviews where you’re looking back on an awesome period and you’re supposed to go on a trip down memory lane. 

Tom, it is hard to chose and I will probably forget to consider half of the things I actually did, but the first thing that pops into my head is “the jump”. I think it was the end of July, maybe it was August. It doesn’t really matter which day it was. What matters was the thing I accomplished that day. Tom, I jumped of an ten meter high rock into a beautiful natural pool of water. Doesn’t sound that interesting does it? But for me, the guy who is shaking like a straw (Dutch sayings, you’ll get it) whenever he stands on the edge of something higher than two meters, jumped of a facking ten meter high rock. It is something I would never ever have seen myself doing and there I was on the Gibb River Road, supported by my awesome Canadian, Dutch and especially British travel mates, doing it. I still feel really proud of facing my fears that day.

What then? Okay I’m going to cheat a little bit. Instead of one moment I’m going to mention one trip. But it is something that I have to tell you, Tom. Some background. When I left, my brother made me a promise that he would come and visit me whenever he managed to make enough money and get enough days off to come over. It was a struggle for him, but the strong and determined person he is, he made it. Not to Australia, but to New Zealand. 25 days he was my travel mate in a country that brought us everything we had hoped for. Awesome extreme sports, breath-taking scenery, memories that will be mentioned for a lifetime and friends that will stay with us for the same amount of time. Apart from that, to do all of this together with him was something I wouldn’t have missed for the world. Two brothers, different individuals, once both on their own tracks, now brought together and enjoying every minute of each others company. As I said, it was unique!

Then the third thing. It’s a hard one, Tom. There isn’t something directly popping into my head. Maybe due to the reason that there are so many things fighting in my head to be put on paper as the third thing. I think I am going to cheat a little bit again. Instead of a one thing I will choose multiple people. Not specific names, but just my travel mates in general. If you would finally follow me on Instagram you could’ve maybe guest this one. Every country I left, I’ve been thanking the people I travelled with. Simply because you can have awesome countries to visit, but the people whom you can share and visit these countries with will shape the memory that will stick with you forever. From intriguing Germans with a slightly bumped car and a ton of amazing stories and ideas to funny little Canadians who are still trying to pronounce the word “stroopwafel” correctly. From British people with a lot of animal knowledge and a wooden pipe to Dutchies with long hair whom hopefully are still quitted with smoking.  And last but not least from slightly gullible British girls to dancing and unique Danish girls. Tom, I can’t mention all of them these were just the once that popped into my head, but I think you will get my point. I met some really awesome people and I made some really special friends that I wouldn’t even have met if I would’ve stayed back home. 

Living Tom, for 366 days in a row right now. For about 50 more. And after that hopefully a lifetime of days more. That’s what it is all about. Living. For you “living” right now is cycling as fast and clever as you can to do something no Dutchman ever did before, win two consecutive major cycling tours. Funny how such a simple thing as “living” can differ for two human beings. How it can even differ for the same human being depending on the stage of life he is in. 

Promise me one thing, Tom. Always allow yourself to discover what “living” is at the stage of life you’re in at that moment. Although happiness is something hard to achieve for us human beings, I think this will get you as close to it as you can come. 
That was it, Tom. We’ll be in touch, I promise. I missed you man!

Cheers Kai 

P.s.: Tom, I wrote this poem a couple of weeks ago. Something new I have been trying. Originally it was called “Happiness”, but after I was done writing you I red it again and realized it was about the one thing I just talked to you about, living.

Sometimes out of the blue,
You have one of those moments.
Where you feel entirely happy
For no reason, without a clue.

They last for seconds, minutes, sometimes hours
And go as fast as they come.
They are little mysteries keeping their secret
Only giving it away to some.

When you need them you have to look,
When you don't expect them they will find.
When they're there you enjoy them,
They can be cruel but mostly kind.

And in those moments just realise, 
How good and beautiful life can be.
How small things can make you happy,
Can make you laugh and see,
That life has more to offer,
Than a house, a job, a wife.
That sometimes all you need,
Is living your life.